August 1st, 2003


Кто знает английский... итальянскийзнать не обязательно :)


Dear Signore Direttore;
Now I am tella you a story how I was treated at Your hotella.
I comma from Roma as tourist to London and stay as a
younga Christian man at your hotella. When I comma in
my room I see is no shit in my bed. How can I sleep
with no shit in my bed? So I calla down to receptione
and tella, I wanna shit.
They tella me: Go to toilet.
I say. No, no. I wanna shit in my bed.
They say: you better not shit in your bed you
What is a sonnawabitch?
I go down for breakfast into ristorante, I order bacon
and eggs and two pissis of toast. I getta only one
piss of toast. I tella waitress, and pointa of toast.
I wanna piss.
She tella me: Go to toilet.
I say : No, no. I wanna piss on my plate.
She then say to me: you bloody hella not piss on the
plate, you sonnawabitch.
What is a sonnawabitch?
Later I go for dinner in your ristorante. Spoon and
knife is laid out, but no fock.
I tella waitress: I wanna fock.
And she tella me: sure everybody wanna fock.
I tella her: NO, no. You don't understand me. I wanna
fock on the table.
She tella me: so you sonnawabitch wanna fock on the
table? Get your ass out of here.
So go to receptione and ask for bill. I no wanna stay
in this hotella no more. When I have paid the billa,
the portier say to me: Thank you, and peace on you.
I say:piss on you too, you sonnawabitch.
I go back to Italy.I never gonna stay at your hotella,
you sonnawabitch.